2004-01-01 - 7:11 a.m.
New Year's Gratitude
Yoz peeps! This is my first entry for the year 2004!
Hahah! A new year for new resolutions... strangely it doesn't feel any different from any other day... opx I shuldn't go all despondent here! Haha! Altho theres a serious chance I would... So lets make it some sort of gratitude letter ba to herald the coming of the new year and kiss the old one good bye..( Russell don't you snicker at this!)
Yep! I thank God for the old year 2003 for all the experiences he allowed to happen to me.. for all the maturing opportunities he gave to me.. for well letting me experience the importance of decision making for me.. wow! I would say 2003 is one of the toughest years of my Life.. Council choir feud.. tt was one of the biggest personal battle I had to fight with.. its like I never knew how to let go... and now when i look back I feel wasted.. and can still rmb the confusion and frustrations.. cos even if your friends are there, they can only do so much.. you have to do the rest on your own. Well, only regret is I din surrender all to God to at least help me think the best route.. but it really helped me mature and know the importance of decision making.. all the interviews I went thru; UWC ( sigh I fouled up tt one.. I wonder wat would happened if I was destined to go?) COuncil ( pivotal point) and A*star (whose job attachment turned out to be a TOTAL waste of my time)... yep a lot of opportunities.. i think? but its been a harrowing experience for me! Council stuff like all the plannings: Chen Shaodong concert.. Open House Facilitators(I din do a good job for tt one cos I panicked last min b4 Ms Siau which was a big major SHITX on my part.. but its too late to regret now.. what can i do more?), CCA Carnival, Orientation, Elects Camp... dances of Mortal Kombat Bringin' Da Noise, Slamdunk the FUnk, Mambo Number 5... which reminds me of my OGL Shu Yi and Anthony! Gosh they were the most fantastic bunch of OGLs anyone can have and I miss them so much.. haha! Not that they will ever know..I WAS IN COSTA!(pak Hou has a lot to live up to!) Choir: Voyage Concert( sighz! One of the best and worst moments of my life), SYF Competition( which we got a Gold for.. hmz. I wonder wat will happen if we qualify for Finals? but ACJC was the best, no mistake!).. wow! I had a lot of major happenings..
Now, as I delve back into the crevices of my mind, I rmb my first three months.. full of hopes and regrets.. and hurts.. hmz! I love 23/03! Do you believe tt? I had the bestest funnest greatest most enjoyable times of my life there! I met Chewy and RR! These two gals totally changed my life ard and were always there for me! its like we r psychic? Haha! I rmb there was this period where I kept reading chewy's mind.. and well lets cut down
To Chewy,
Thanks for always being there girl! i had great fun with you and your cheerful laughter never seeks to brighten up my day! You always gave my great sound and wise advices and well lets say you were always ard the corner when I needed you! Cheers for the NEw year!
To Ren Rong,
Hi mum! You were one of the most unique wackiest insane totally awesome girl I have ever met! You were always there to support me! And you were so full of innocence.. lala! And a great artist too! Your merry giggles are so infectious too!
Girls, lets meet the new year with the motto of always Staying True To Ourselves!
VJEM ROXZ!
To my 23/03 class, thanks for giving me a memorable period of my Life.. for letting me know tt a class can be strong and united.. for letting me know a class can bond so well tt it can be fun... thanks for letting me know and for being there for me...
To Voldemort,
You are still in the same class as me.. and the pain still hurts but not as deeply as before.. perhaps you did what u felt was right.. the cold hard way.. and even tho things will nv be the same again, i can't say friends.. so even if you r in my class for 1 more year, i will try to forget more and more each day... but well be kind..
And after first three months, i landed in 15/03 where i realised the strength of Girl Power, how it pays to be individualistic, how it pays to have people backing you, how rewarding life is when you know you do not face the tide alone...
To Marilyn,
hey gal! You've been one of the best and greatest friends I have in AJ when fate tossed us into the same class! You have been a great source of support and a good conscience when Geraldine and i wanna pon... shes there when i got problems with my crushes.. and a very good source to copy homework from! =)
To Geraldine,
You are a very different and individualistic girl and a very special one as tt... you are mysterious and yet so open at the same time! My partner in crime for maths! And you have also been a great form of support for me! Thanks for everything!
Marilyn, Geraldine and I form the group ACUTE which we will not disclose but yes, I realised the importance of do u call this sisterly affection? And the fact we were always there for one another overrules all... the yong taufu sessions.. haha! if you think I eat healthy look at Geraldine! We always had debates on where to go for breaks? RR to copy homework or canteen to eat! And the time when shouted Stupid CHin Hong and he thot it was a ghost? lalala! We were great k.. hahah bane of teachers? lolx!
ACUTE ROXZ!
Breaking down, I just got to mention Kelvin Chew.. hes one of the funniest and nicest guys I ever met.. not tt I met much nice guys.. and hes very funny, amiable, sociable, friendly, kind and the list goes on.. and he CAN so make u feel guilty if u ahem wan to pon ANY lesson... yeah I rmb tt instance very very well... and hes also a super concerned friend and well hes one heck of a great friend.. and the little things he did mean alot to you when you feel down... hahah tts one friend I don't regret making and erm yeah, thanks for everything Kelvin!
To Johnson,
hello.. hahah ever since you were the one to approach me on mirc despite alot of pple insisting I've a guys nick..but Johnson is a really sincere guy.. and he has helped me alot.. altho I may act i don't feel indebted, i still thank him for being there and sorry for not exactly being a good friend.. cos even if I say I'm very bzy and totally stressed out by Council stuff choir stuff.. tts no excuse to ignore and hurt my friends. So to all my friends, SoRRY!
To Homework,
I'm glad you never knew tho you might have suspected.. and well you were a nice guy while it lasted, and you helped me a lot for the Grid networking.. hahha what a way and you helped me a lot for maths! When Russell couldn't do it.. haha! you did the maths for me! thanks.. and yes, for helping me mature in my thinkings of a crush, for the erasement of Voldemort from my mind.. for the simple joys you once brought to my life..
Hmz, to Choir pple
I'm drifting away from all of you, I can only stay close to those who were in first 3 mths.. esp my seniors! i miss my seniors alot like Cheng Keat Kai Quan Xiuming Rachel Xiao Mei Man Hong! Sighz! I miss them all and the fun we had! I miss the fellowship of my family Charlotte, Xiao Jing, Jeslin, Vivien, Seng Hong, Eugene, Wan Song... yes! I miss you all and I'm glad to have tasted your friendship, but now as i quit choir cos I dun wanna pull u all down and it is sheer madness to carry on, I hope we can remain Friends Forever!
To my council pple,
I'm forging bonds with you guys slowly but surely... I'm learning to appreciate your worth and value and meaning.. tho I resent the fact some of you think I put choir over precedence to council... i'm learning not to scorn u.. and I made great friends in Council too! Council Marilyn, Claire, Wei Yang, Jane.. they have each taught me alot in their own special way and I thank the Lord for placing them in my life.. and well, I realised tt as Council does more stuff together we become bonded more wholey and completedly...
To my own natural Family, my dad, mum Alex and Malcolm, this has been a real harrowing and enriching journey! i koe u all r trying to adapt to the 180 degree change in me.. and also haven't got there yet.. I try to compromise.. to put you all as my first priority again... I love you all! Please dun ever leave me! Thanks for always being there for me, for helping me see when I'm blind, for helping me fly when my wings are clipped, and releasing me from my binds.. Thanks for all you have done and it means so much to me...
To Emerson,
Thanks for everything you have done so far for me! We have journeyed for like almost close to two months.. and well, I don't regret and I thank the Lord for putting you in my Life! Seems wierd.. haha we were good friends even tho we never admitted to each other.. I treated you like some kor which u refused to acknowledge cos it would be incestous but of course, I din know then.. and after talking to me, you realised hmz, we were quite alike and then u ranked me in your category of friends which is you trust me with your girlfriend.. I was like HMZ! of course I'm no threat cos I AM A GIRL unless I happen to be a lesbian in disguise! Tsk tsk! Haha.. and how we both liked each other good friends... funny how things turn out right? And I think you are shuai altho Geraldine did say something =X hahah cos well, I have two very big weaknesses and I think you have guessed them.. haha! And I really like tt pic of you in uniform! You look well so confident and smart and hahah altho I didn't ogle at you when u did pull-ups the other time cos I was very distracted by Homework... I think you look good doing pull-ups too! =) Thanks for all you have done for me.. and for being especially there when I did Grid Networking! All the hours u stayed up with me tohelp me chiong last minute work.. the times you came down and had lunch with me.. yes, I thank you for it.. cos you have done so much for me! And now we r in a confusing stage.. of whether we r steady or not... cos we r unofficial as my parents dun allow.. but yet then again, we act like one.. sighz! Lets hold our heads high and face the future without fear and with courage! And a last note to everyone, Let us Always Stay True To Ourselves!